from like to loke #3

I knew that the mood had shifted because when he left the restaurant he offered a rather brisk goodbye.

I asked him the other night how he felt about the situation and this is what he said (straight from the horses mouth)

"It didn't seem like you were interested so I wasn't going to waste any time. I was interested, but it takes two parties to tango. "

The language of loke

from like to loke part 3

read part one here
read part two here

There was something about this guy. Something about him that made me gloriously happy when we were together, but it also made me feel like I'd been punched in the stomach when he wasn't near me.


It was strange for me to feel such a strong connection to someone in such a short time. I was usually such a guarded person it worried me that if things continued I would be in a position to be hurt if he didn't choose me.


I decided to throw caution to the wind and let events unfold on their own.



Then, lucky for me. Lucky for me and my broken heart the next tram was not at the stop. So we all went for ice-cream & Kyle too.

I smiled politely and hoped he knew that behind that smile was an apology. I'd been rude and I had let all my fears and worries control me. I re-promised myself to relax and be myself.




We sat near enough to see each other on the tram. He was above me and I thought I saw him sneak a few looks. By the time we were back in Adelaide I felt like things would be o.k, I would be o.k. No matter what happened.

______________________________________

I don't know how I got here. I am in my room. I am getting ready to go back down and meet Kyle. It is the end of the day.


Collette and I are chatting about things. By things, I mean Kyle. I ask her if she thinks he likes me. She says she thinks so. She asks me if I like him. I say I think so. I tell her, if I date him then I think I will eventually marry him. So the real question is, am I ready to get married? She asks if I am. I say, maybe.


For someone who weeks before had chosen to be single for a while. For someone who thought that marriage was years in the future, I had done a complete 360. 


I had decided to work really hard at being open and honest. At being myself and always communicating - so that there would be no secrets. Then, and only then, could I know if he liked me for me. Then I could be assured that he really was my forever.


From the moment I walk out the door of our room, he is the only guy at convention I look at. It was always him.

______________________________________

We are in a large room, the same room that was used for registrations earlier that week.


We are chatting on the couch. He looks at me and asks rather suddenly if I would like to dance. I point out there is not music. He says that it doesn't matter and holds out his hand. I pause for a moment contemplating another request from a now, less than stranger. He says "don't you trust me?" and I am taken back to earlier that day. I just about melt all over the floor, again.


How does he do that? How does he make me weak at the knees so easily.


We dance, the room is empty and silent. Only the music of our hearts beating can be heard. It is the only music we need.

____________________________________

We are sitting on some steps. It is late and it is time to go. We are still chatting, enjoying each others company for hours without a gap in conversation.


He leans forward to kiss me and I virtuously turn my head a little to the side and lean in for a cheek kiss and hug. I am laughing inside at his forward confidence.


He likes me.


It is the end of the first day. The end of the first day of forever.

read part four here