From loke to love #5

read from loke to love #4 here

The language of loke

from loke to love part five

There is 21 days between me and eternity with my forever.

Kyle has flown back to Victoria for a week to work and save money for our honeymoon. I miss him dearly. I miss his warmth and comfort. I miss the calmative effect he has on me. 

Without him I feel like a little bird balancing on a power line. Flitting about trying to keep my balance and finally loosing footing before two little feet, in a moment of disaster, hit two separate lines and puff the current is complete and my little feet are completely singed and my little feathers are in a flurry above my head.

I get hives. I get a serious case of hives that stays for a week. My eyes puff up like a balloon. Like I am allergic to life.

Finally as the hives start to fade in severity the back of my throat bursts into a big delicious pustulous ulcer. It oozes a horrid trickle of green down the back of my throat. I can't eat. It is 14 days till eternity.

To make money matters worse, I am so unwell I can't work. 

I am a mess. My feathers aren't just ruffled, the shock has violently plucked them from my tiny bird body and hurled them into the sky.

I loose weight. The fat melts from my body as the healthy size I had been struggling to maintain slips from my grasp.

I am back to thin. Pale. Sickly.

I don't have the energy for anything. Let alone planning last minute wedding ideas.  It is with a weary heart I board the plane with 7 days to go. The antibiotics I am taking leave a horrid taste in my mouth. I can barely talk. I am completely defeated.

At the airport I walk the white tiles that seem to carry on for a thousand miles and descend to the bag area.

Kyle is there. He turns to me. The corners of his mouth turned up in a smile but his eyes greet me with worry. He takes me by the shoulders and pulls me deep into his embrace.

" I am so hungry" I whisper with a choke

"We'll get you something to eat" he soothes

"It hurts to eat" I bow my head in defeat

"You'll be ok" His words balm my throat like warm honey.


And the worry dissipates as he settles my broken mind.

20 minutes later on the way home, I am improved enough to try and eat. The first meal I eat in 7 days is a KFC popcorn chicken. Chicken never tasted so good.